Self love is the new black!

So I feel like my last post was a bit of a downer. Especially as I set it to post on Mothers Day - awks! I had totally forgotten about Mothers Day when I scheduled the post!!

Today, I saw this post on MindBodyGreen about learning to love your body. And this comes just days after my Mum gave me a magazine article about being kind to yourself (which I'm yet to read).

So Universe, I get it, I am starting to listening to you. I will read the articles, take the advice on board, and take action.

I am sick of not loving myself enough. It has been such a long time since I fully accepted myself and been happy with the way I am... it was a magical few years between 17 and 20.

Mostly in the time since then, I have liked myself. Usually enough, sometimes barely enough. But loving myself? Surely that's what husbands are for!? (I'm joking!!)

So I'm ready to change, ready to be a woman comfortable in her own skin - stretch marks and all... well, maybe not the stretch marks just yet.

The MindBodyGreen post had a few suggested positive affirmations to help on the journey of self love. I have printed them off and I'm going to put them next to my bed to be the last words I see at night, and the first words I see in the morning....

• I am enough
• I am beautiful
• I am unique
• I love and respect my body (also, my mind and spirit!)
• I am more than my body
• My body is a safe, happy place
• I reject artificial standards of beauty that do not serve me
• I love myself unconditionally
• I see the beauty in all living things

To be honest, that last one has never a problem for me. But the rest is going to be hard to feel comfortable with for a while.

In the meantime, to counteract the negative feeling I was left with after my last post, here are a list of things I love about myself:

• I love the shape of my feet and how cute they look when I get a pedicure
• I love my legs
• Mr M loves my bum, so I guess that I can love that too.
• My biceps are pretty alright too.
• I love my big heart, and how open I am to loving people and letting them in.
• I love that my smile always reaches my eyes. I don't usually fake smile - if it's not for real then I just won't smile, full stop. Oh unless it's small talk stuff and I'm being polite... but even then, I think I'm pretty genuine about my smile.
• I love my eyebrows - I have had a number of beauticians in the past tell me how lovely they are, and my Mum is totes jealous of them! :)
• I love my personality, I'm usually bubbly and always ready to see the positive side of things (unless it relates to me.... but I'm going to change that!!)

Huh. I actually already feel a bit better.
I did NOT see that coming! :)

So Ladies, and Gentlemen!, tell me what you love about yourself. It can be something small, it can be something big. It can be something physical or a part of your personality.

What do you LOVE about being you??

How I feel about my post-babies body

Last weekend, a beautiful picture appeared in my instagram feed from Keeping Up With The Holsbys.

The title of the post was The stories of our post-baby flesh, and the pictures are just gorgeous. If there is only one blog you check out today, make it this one.

It was a thought provoking post for me, as I have a real love/hate relationship with my post-baby body:

• I love, and am in utter awe, that my body incubated and delivered two big healthy babies (Mac was 4.03kg and Warrie was 4.35kg)
• I hate the stretch marks and extra skin that came with such big babies that were all out the front (you couldn't tell I was pregnant from behind). I was 117cm around with Mac and 122cm around with Warrie.
• I love that I was able to breastfeed my babies, and the amazing bonding moments we had together.
• I hate that I can now easily hold the remote under my boobs

I won't go on, you get the idea. And I am sure that there are many other mothers out there who can totally relate.

I know that I am supposed to wear my stretch marks as a badge of honour.
I know that I'm not supposed to let society dictate what "beauty" is.
I know that I should listen to Mr M when he tells be that I look beautiful, and he wouldn't change a thing about me.

But I don't.

I hate my stretch marks (yet I do nothing to get rid of them - what the heck is up with that!? Some sort of self sabotage??)
I despair that I am now 5kg heavier than my original pre-pregnancy weight. I am in the gym or running every lunchtime, and seeing no change. I'm now working on the diet side of things... Fingers crossed
I don't like to get undressed in front of Mr M with the lights on, I'm terrified that he will suddenly change his mind about me. (I have absolutely NO EVIDENCE to support this, it's just my brain going into worst case scenario mode)

Then I see such amazing photos, and I know, I KNOW, that I need to cut myself some slack. And I try, I really do....

Maybe one day I'll just wake up and suddenly be all "Oh wow - my body grew two whole new people, and yes it's softer than it was 10 years ago. But it is freaking amazing, and I am so proud to be in this skin".

Maybe.