It's up to me to keep the flames burning, but the spark is there.
So here I am. Again.
I need to be getting words down. Currently I have thoughts and ideas in my head but I don't put them down. They stay stuck in the void.
Mr M says I'm not a writer because I don't write things down.
He says that if I was really a writer, I would have a notebook and be jotting down notes.
All. The. Time.
Well more fool him, because I DO have a damn notebook. Sure I haven't written as much as I would/could/should.... But it's there.
And I HAVE had ideas, and I HAVE made notes.
Ok, indignation spent. Anger over.
I know that he was doing the whole reverse psychology thing. And I am just pissed because it worked... Again.
I have always wanted to write, ever since I can remember.
I used to write short stories when I was in primary school - it was about the only piece of homework I would ever complete on time.
When I had friends over to stay the night, we used to write short plays to perform for my family (I was more the writer, less the actor).
A school friend and I used to write radio shows that we (and a few other friends) would perform and record. It was usually a newscast or a sportscast, and my lasting memory of this is him pretending to be John McEnroe - a la "You canNOT be serious!"
I don't know what happened to dampen the desire... I blame hormones and boys. And probably a fondness for excessive nights out.
I've just started listening to a "how to be a writer" podcast. I know, I know, I can't believe I have only just discovered podcasts either.... I'm only a few episodes in, but already I have learnt so much just from listening to the interviews with authors. The way I spend my daily commute has pretty much changed my life (I'm also doing a "learn to speak French" podcast too).
I have a book inside me. That much I know. The only thing I have to deal with is the fact that it's a non-fiction book (I just don't think I have a novel in me... As much as I wish I did).
I've told a very small handful of people what my idea is, and the feedback I have had is "yes! I would read that!" - so very positive.
That's the book that I want to write; but in the meantime I have a small little taster book that I'm working on; just to get me into the whole "I'm a writer" malarkey.
Though I can't help but wonder if it's a cop out... Keeping me from my real goal.
Nonetheless, I AM going to finish my little book - I have an illustrator, I have to finish it!
I have bookie contacts who can help with the whole self publishing thing... I have to finish it.
For my own sense of accomplishment,I HAVE TO finish it!
Apart from anything else, I have put it down as a 2015 goal to finish it. So fuck anyone (myself and Mr M included) who thinks that it won't be done.
I would say "watch this space", but I don't want to put too much pressure on myself.....
So watch this space!!! (haha fuck you deflated ego, you are so going to have to enjoy actually finishing something for a change!)
